NO EXPERIENCE, BUT LOYAL - YOUR NEW CITY MANAGER

I'VE NEVER HAD A REAL JOB IN MY LIFE, BUT I SURE HAVE KISSED MAJOR TOM ASS!

We told you so.

Just in time for the holidays, what better gift than to promote your long time Tom Ass kisser and give him the $300,000 salary he deserves.

NO Private Sector Experience.

NO Managerial Experience.

NO Financial Experience.

NEVER had a real job in his life!

But that doesn't matter.

Regalado ``is making sure the top city decision-makers are people he can trust, and are part of his long-term team,'' said Dario Moreno, a political science professor at Florida International University. ``His style is to have people he can trust around him.''

 

Which is why Regalado gave Dario Moreno a contract to teach "ethics" classes.

Chuck Rabin of course never asked Regalado who else was in the running because no one but Crapp was getting this job and everyone knows it.  

 

Chuck is nicely playing along, already pointing out that "Crapp would be the second African American to oversee the city's workforce" and quoting Tom Ass saying "some of his supporters expected him to name a Cuban American to the top post."

In Regalado's mind of divisive ethnic politics, naming an inexperienced black man to city manager trumps any considerations of knowledge or experience, it's the ethnicity that counts, and not the brains.

Chuck and the Herald play further into Regalado's hands:

"Monday, in a meeting with The Miami Herald's editorial board, Crapp downplayed his lack of experience in handling large budgets and overseeing large staffs. The eight months he spent under Migoya's tutelage, he said, felt more like five years."

 

But that's the point.

Tony Crapp has never managed ANYTHING of significance.

 

Not in five years

 

Not in eight months

 

Not in eight minutes.

The ONLY reason he is the city's manager is because he is black, and he is loyal to Tom Ass.

We would respect Regalado if he came out and said it: 

 

"Look, Tony is black, I need votes in the black community, and he is loyal to me."

Stop the fucking charade already.

 

In a metropolitan area of more than 3 million people, Tony Crapp Jr. is THE MOST QUALIFIED person to be city manager.

What's worse is how all the commissioners are lining up to support the Tom Ass.

Commission Chairman Sarnoff said Crapp's lack of a background in finance is a concern, but added, ``I think he's going to have a great team behind him. He'll be fine in operations. My only concern is in the numbers part. He's going to need a very capable CFO and budget director, and I think he's got both.''

The very capable CFO and budget director being our pals Larry and Diana?

The city is in a financial crisis that will continue until voters wake up and realize they are all being played for fools. 

Regalado, Sarnoff, and the commission don't care about the voters, taking the city down the Crapper, lying to all of us by not raising "taxes" but raising "fees," and using our money as their private bank accounts.

Wake up.................

And throw all these bastards out of office!

WATCH YOUR BACK EXPO!

Oh Expo!

You were doing so well avoiding the slings and arrows of the media, navigating the treacherous waters of Miami politics, all relatively unscathed.

Your predecessor stopped police shootings and dropped crime to record lows, but was screwed over for accepting a demo Lexus.

Your first year had "four fatal shootings by officers, a videotape of police punching a man while he's pinned down, a botched attempt to control an unruly crowd and some anti-corruption investigations that fizzled."

You didn't even find Manny Diaz' bike (or the Grove and Brickell rapists for that matter).

We wanted you gone.

So did Uncle Luke.

But you managed to survive.

Until now.

Why?

You fucked with the wrong person Expo.

The second Louis Cabrera was transferred over to the City Manager's office, we knew you were in trouble.

And now, master of public relations Mayor Tomas "Keen Knack" Regalado drops a bomb on you to the Miami Herald.

After a year, police chief under the gun.

Ironic headline no?

Forget that it was the Mayor who hired you.

That it was the Mayor who told you to start the "anti-corruption" unit that would go after his political enemies.

Or that it was the Mayor himself who said that "violence would be responded to with violence."

Now the Mayor says "It's all on Exposito.''

Just because you fucked with his Godson Louis Cabrera.

Your days are numbered Chief.

So watch your back Expo...

Because Luisito is already making space on his collar for a fourth star.

YOU'RE FUCKING KIDDING RIGHT???

"Anyone who steals public monies from any government entity will be caught and prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.'' 

 

Do you read this blog?  

 

The Crespo Gram Report?  

 

Investigation Miami?

You must be fucking kidding!

COMING UP NEXT WEEK:

 

More on our friend the Ethicist Robert Meyers, in bed not with dear Rodzandra, but with Chairman of Everything Marc David Sarnoff, Esquire.

 

Stay tuned and...

 

"Wear something nice!"

TRUST ME!!!

Trust me!

That was the message from $422,000 a year County Manager George "Uber Bureaucrat" Burgess to the County Commission when grilled yesterday regarding the mess that is Miami Dade Transit.

The "Federales" have come down hard on the County, freezing their ability to draw down any money for transit projects.

As the Herald reports:

"Miami-Dade Transit's federal funding suspension grew out of accounting errors, poor management and erroneous information relayed to federal auditors, but does not appear to reflect fraud, Miami-Dade County Manager George Burgess told commissioners on Tuesday."

Accounting errors. Poor management. Erroneous information relayed to federal auditors.

That's enough to get you fired anywhere, but not at Miami Dade County!

Oh no, Bureaucrat Burgess puts on his best face and tells everyone not to worry, he has it all under control.

And there's more...

"The session brought to light concerns that several commissioners have about whether the federal funding suspension may disrupt transit services.

"Burgess and Assistant County Manager Ysela Llort told commissioners it may take several months for the county to wrap up its own investigation and carry out a modification of transit financial controls before the agency can persuade the Federal Transit Administration to lift the funds' suspension.

"Burgess said he expects the internal investigation and ``corrective'' procedure to be wrapped up by early March. Llort said it was still unclear when the federal government would lift the suspension because she doesn't know when precisely the Federal Transit Administration will return to Miami-Dade to conduct a new audit."

We know all about the thorough internal investigations conducted by the city and county.

Who gives a shit about public transit anyway?

Only poor people and blacks use it.

The Mayor, Manager, Commissioners, and their lackeys don't have to schlep for a bus. They ALL get car allowances.

Mayor Carlos Alvarez has been too busy fighting a recall to properly reign in Bureaucrat Burgess and has let him run amok in screwing things up at County Hall.

Burgess' tentacles reach even further with the great job he has done at fucking up Jackson too.

Everything the County touches turns to shit, and yet, no one ever loses their job.

Here's a message to Mayor Carlito:

You want to avert the disaster of your eventual recall? Don't fight in court anymore.

Grow some balls, and get rid of Burgess.

Fire his ass.

Show the people that you will no longer tolerate the bullshit coming from the Manager's office, and that at over $400,000, you expect accountability and results.

SUMMER OF VIOLENCE TURNS INTO A COVER UP!

``. . .I don't see transparency anymore. We see cover up,''

 

So says Nathaniel Wilcox, executive director of PULSE, speaking to the Herald on the police shootings that took place earlier this year during the Summer of Violence.

 

Remember the promises from Chief Miguel Exposito that an investigation would be made into these shootings?  And all the promises from Mayor Tomas Regalado on running a transparent city government?

"DeCarlos Moore has been deceased five months and we have not gotten a report,'' said Rev. Jerome Starling. 

 

"I'm mad as hell because people have died and we have not received a report.''

Nor will you ever receive a report!

Meanwhile, the cop in charge of this mess gets a promotion.

The Mayor's message to the black community?

We will fight violence with violence, and if you don't like it, too fucking bad!

ON AIR, ON OUR DIME!

A reader alerted us to the fact that today, at 3:00 PM, during her scheduled radio show on "La Poderosa" 670 AM, School Board Member and Daughter of Tomasito, Raquelita Regalado had as her guest none other than our pal Jose "Pepe" Fulgueira.

For those of you who don't remember "Pepe," he is employed by Mayor Tomasito as a "Special Assistant."

Now, what on Earth does a "Special Asistannt" do for a Mayor?

Glad you asked.

For one, Jose "Pepe" goes on Raquelita's radio show at 3 PM, when most of us are at work.  This would not be such a big deal but for the fact that Jose "Pepe" is being payed by all of us, the taxpayers of Miami, to be working at his city job, whatever that is, at 3 PM.

Instead of specially assisting the mayor, handling constituent complaints, of trying to fix the incredibly fucked up inner workings of the city, "Pepe" is on air, on our dime, yucking it up with the Mayor's daughter.

This is our tax dollars at work.

Yet, it is not surprising.

Above we see the picture of "Pepe" along with the "24 hour mayor" clearly skirting state law by campaigning for Raquelita while on city time.

Did "Pepe" get in trouble for breaking the law?

Of course not! 

He is a member of the Tomass inner sphincter, along with Tony Crapp, Ada Rojas, and Jose Marrero, all grossly under-qualified, grossly overpaid, and all above the law.

It's Miami Bitches!

So while the rest of us try to eek it out in a double digit unemployment rate economy, our city workers are living it up!

BREAKING NEWS --- CASE DISMISSED!!!

Miami Dade Mayor Carlos Alvarez will voluntarily dismiss his lawsuit in the Billionaire Norman Braman recall lawsuit after discovery motions have shown that Clerk Harvey Ruvin did in fact certify the petition signatures.

This gives the Billionaire Braman (who contributed to Ruvin's clerk campaign) the green light to proceed with the recall of the mayor.

The Billionaire and his pal Tomasito are out for revenge against Alvarez for the Marlins deal and even though it was the COUNTY COMMISSION that voted to approve the higher taxes, Alvarez is getting the shaft.

Alvarez nonetheless is out fighting, defending his actions before the Downtown Bay Forum.

"I was not going to be the mayor that closes down fire stations, that closes down parks, basically all these things that I've been working for my entire adult life," said Alvarez, his voice occasionally cracking with emotion. "I was not going to do that. I'd rather be recalled."

Well Carlos,

It may happen sooner rather than later.

Statement of BR on Behalf of Mayor